Unthinkable circumstances…they can be either those of joy or great sorrow. Odds are, you have experienced both at one time or another in life. My greatest sorrow was nearly 22 years ago.
After navigating through a seamless first pregnancy, our son Joseph was born on February 28, 1990. At 7 lbs., 5 oz. and 21 ½ inches long, he looked perfect and whole. But he wasn’t. At five days old, Joseph died from heart defects that were not detected before his arrival and these defects could not be fixed after his arrival. I found myself in an unthinkable circumstance…
My confusion, hurt, and misunderstanding was immense. I had come to know Christ as my Savior at the age of 13. I believed that God had a reason and purpose for ALL things that happened in our lives. I understood, even then, that the God that I loved and trusted throughout my youth was the same God that I must continue to loved and trust as I navigated through this unthinkable circumstance.
I did question why. I did question what I might have done to cause this to happen. I did feel anger and misunderstanding toward God. But I never doubted my faith. I knew I could not make sense of this through my own power. I had tried that for some time, and couldn’t. In the beginning, I felt some feelings of abandonment but as time went on, I began to know with certainty that was the enemy trying to use this unthinkable circumstance to shake my faith and cause me to turn away from my personal relationship with Christ.
Then my unthinkable circumstance shifted…living the rest of my life with anger toward God and a part from Him was something I could not and did not want to imagine. My relationship with Him and His love gave me great comfort. The assurance of His promises was something I could not abandon. Never.
“Who shall separate us from the love of Christ? Shall trouble or hardship or persecution or famine of nakedness or danger or sword? No, in all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us. For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither the present nor the future, no any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.” Romans 8:35 – 39 NIV
That covers it definitively! NOTHING can separate us from God’s love and blessings. Not even this great sorrow I had suffered. I knew I could be more than a conqueror in not just this circumstance, but in EVERY circumstance I find myself in as I walk through life. I am so grateful that I did not allow this unthinkable circumstance to become a stumbling block in my relationship with Christ. If that had been what I chose, what a sad waste of how this circumstance would have been used in my life and those around me.
I now have the advantage and experiences of 20+ years. Since that time, I have come to understand the meaning and true-life application of James 1:2-4 where it says, “Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking in anything.”
Unthinkable circumstances…joys, sorrows, testing, blessings…all are intended to push us on and up and closer to what God intends us to ultimately become—more like Him. I agree with C.S. Lewis when he says we won’t get there in this life, but He means to get us as close as possible until then!
Jan Rosales
Beavercreek, Ohio
Author of, “Given In Love But Not Mine to Keep: Finding Strength In The Loss Of A Newborn
Child.”
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